Breaking Free from the Fear of Human Approval
Pastor Victoria Sowell
The desire for human approval often holds a powerful grip on our lives, shaping our actions and even our self-worth. This struggle with the fear of man – the tendency to seek the approval of others above all else – is a common experience, yet it’s one we’re called to overcome. In Galatians 1:10, the Apostle Paul speaks to this, asking, “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God?” It's a question that challenges us to examine where we place our trust and sense of identity. Click the link above for the full message.
Human beings are inherently designed for community, and the approval of others often feels essential. Yet, relying on this validation can keep us from fully experiencing the freedom God intends. Here, we’ll explore why God’s opinion should matter most and how to break free from the confines of others’ expectations.
His Opinion Matters Most
There’s a calling for each of us to live primarily for God’s approval rather than man’s. Our purpose is to bring glory to God, reflecting His love and truth in all we do. However, this doesn’t mean isolating ourselves or rejecting wise counsel. Instead, it’s about being firmly rooted in our identity as beloved children of God.
Questions to Consider
When the fear of man is at the forefront, we may find ourselves silently asking:
Am I good enough?
Do they approve of me?
What do people say about me?
These inner questions reveal the underlying need for acceptance, but God's approval is what ultimately defines us.
Made for Acceptance
Since childhood, we’re conditioned to seek validation, from school grades to career achievements. Many studies reveal that people’s self-worth is often measured by external validation, and social media amplifies this, creating feedback loops that fuel the need for constant praise.
Yet, as much as we crave connection, God designed us to find ultimate satisfaction in His love, which is far more consistent and fulfilling than human praise. Unlike temporary validation, His love remains steady, giving us a foundation that transcends changing human opinions.
Choosing Trust Over Fear
David’s words in Psalm 118 illustrate the power of placing trust in God over man’s opinions. He writes, “The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?” This level of trust releases us from the trap of people-pleasing, reminding us that fear of man can ensnare us, while trust in God provides lasting security.
Similarly, Proverbs 29:25 echoes this truth: “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.” Trusting God frees us from the shifting approval of people, allowing us to stand firm in His love and purpose for us.
Human Approval is a Moving Target
Attempting to earn human approval is a never-ending journey. Sociologists call this the “looking-glass self,” which means we shape our self-view based on how we think others perceive us. But people’s opinions change constantly, creating an unstable foundation for self-worth.
Building a life on human opinions is exhausting and fleeting. Every day, public opinion shifts, and the same people who applaud us today may turn their backs tomorrow. This fickle approval cannot meet our deep need for love and acceptance – only God can do that. A solid relationship with Him is unshakable, providing a confidence that’s not dependent on others.
How the Fear of Man Holds Us Back
1. Fear of Man Silences Our Voice for God
One way fear manifests is by keeping our faith limited to safe spaces, hindering us from sharing our convictions and shining a light in a world that needs it. This fear often silences our voice when we might otherwise speak about our beliefs, stand firm in our faith, or make a meaningful impact.
Consider Peter, one of Jesus' closest followers. Despite his loyalty, he denied knowing Jesus out of fear of what others might think or do. We see in Matthew 26 that fear led Peter to betray his friend and himself. For Peter, and often for us, the desire for approval can lead to self-betrayal, silencing the truth of who we are in God.
When we hide our faith, we miss opportunities to grow and share in the joy of living authentically. Whose approval are we living for? Jesus said in Matthew 10:32-33, “Whoever acknowledges me before others, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven.” This promise encourages us to stay true, even when it means risking rejection.
2. Fear of Man Keeps Us from Moving Forward
Fear of criticism, even from close friends or family, can prevent us from stepping into the new things God calls us to. Sometimes, the people we rely on most may not understand our path, but their approval isn’t a prerequisite for our obedience to God.
In Genesis 12, Abram was called to leave his home and move to an unknown land at 75 years old. Despite the potential judgment from those around him, he followed God’s voice. For us, too, God’s calling might take us out of familiar territory or require a leap of faith. When we trust Him above the voices around us, we find courage to take the next step.
Personal Testimonies of Answering God’s Call
For those who feel called to something specific, stepping into that purpose can bring moments of doubt, resistance, and even opposition. Many people in Scripture faced this, including Timothy, a young leader who faced criticism and skepticism due to his age. In 1 Timothy 4:12, Paul encourages him, “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example.” Whether young or old, God’s calling transcends age, societal expectations, and other limitations.
Following God’s direction might mean being misunderstood or even criticized, but His approval brings a peace that people’s opinions cannot replace.
3. Fear of Man Diminishes Self-Worth
Living for others’ approval affects how we see ourselves. It can lead to insecurities and make our self-worth fragile. Yet, the love of God tells a different story. Timothy Keller beautifully put it this way: “To be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God.” Jesus’ sacrifice shows us our value, offering eternal life and a love that doesn’t fade or depend on our performance.
John 3:16 reminds us that God’s love for us is unchanging and complete. Embracing this truth, we no longer rely on the approval of others for our sense of worth. While human rejection stings, God’s love empowers us to keep going, grounded in His view of us.
A Reflection on True Confidence
In Matthew 10:28, Jesus teaches us, “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul.” People don’t hold our future, define our worth, or determine our success as God does. His opinion alone is the one we can trust, providing a foundation for true confidence.
When fear of man clouds our self-view, we see a distorted picture. Trusting in what God says about us provides clarity, helping us make choices that align with His will rather than human expectations.
Taking a Stand: Drowning Out the Noise
Throughout Scripture and even in popular stories, we see individuals standing firm despite criticism, embodying the strength it takes to live authentically. Here are a few examples:
Noah was mocked for building the ark, yet he remained faithful.
Mary, the mother of Jesus, faced judgment but trusted God’s purpose for her life.
David overcame doubt and discouragement to become a leader and king.
Had they allowed the opinions of others to sway them, their stories would be vastly different. For each of us, God’s voice calls us to a similar courage – one that is unafraid of people’s opinions and willing to step forward in faith.
How to Begin Overcoming the Fear of Man
Breaking free from the fear of man is a journey, one that starts with trusting God’s voice over all others. Here are some practical steps to begin:
Identify the areas where others’ opinions hold too much influence. What decisions or actions are you afraid to take due to potential criticism?
Commit to prayer and reflection. Ask God for the courage to prioritize His voice in your life.
Surround yourself with encouragement. Build relationships that point you back to God’s truth, offering support when you feel challenged.
Let God’s view of you redefine your sense of worth and direction. Remember, His opinion doesn’t shift with every wave of change, but remains constant, empowering you to stand firm.
Further Reading
When People Are Big and God Is Small by Edward T. Welch - Read more here
Approval Addiction by Joyce Meyer - Read more here
Other Links
Want to hear more? Check out last week’s message titled “Fear of the Future.”
For more resources on finding your purpose, visit www.viewchurch.co/resources